In Celebration Of Waking Up In Utter Confusion!

At this point we’re getting snow every other day or so, and I’ve officially had enough. Tomorrow night we’re supposed to be clobbered, yet again: a big John Holmes-sized accumulation. It’s bullshit, I tell ya. Yeah, I know… I complain about hot and humid weather, too. But who says I can’t spread the hate around? […]

The Mystery of the Flowery Hand and Other Adventures

About an hour after I climbed out of bed yesterday morning I noticed my left hand smelled like flowers. And I’ve never been able to figure out why. I have a feeling someone slathered himself (more likely herself) in a lotion of some sort, and I got hit with a bit of the shrapnel. But […]